Journal Posts

Loss of Hero
Loss of a Hero



As a DM it should only come natural that the torturing, maiming and the overall abuse of the players are the most exhilarating aspects of my job. Nay, my purpose! Admittedly I like abusing the players in their struggles, I don’t hold punches, I don’t whiff rolls to avoid blows, and when the players ask me about my opinion about a certain session or adventure I will be straightforward and in reference to their character just state “you are going to die.”

Yet, even from my lofty throne of DM goodness there comes moments when a sense of humbleness washes over me and I stumble as a “killer” DM and feel more like an empathetic soul, watching the unfolding of tragedy of which even I cannot alter. These moments, though few and far in-between, test my will as a true DM, one who is indifferent and uncaring- in one word in ‘fair.’ As silly as it sounds I struggle with what is correct and “what should be” correct.

In recent sessions events lead to the untimely end of one of the player characters. A blue dragon, Menet’ Anashnon, fought the party, and although the party proved to be a very formidable opponent the dragon was able to kill off one of the characters. As the encounter drew to its finale the dragon in a fit of rage snatched the lifeless corpse of the dead character and made off into the unknown with a trophy to be had. Oddly, I didn’t intend for it to happen like that, yet as old wisdom states ‘expect the unexpected.’
The characters having regained their strength and bandaging their wounds, decided to pursue the dragon, if they could rescue the body it might be possible for them to wrestle away the body from death and raise forth their fallen comrade…

The player whose character died decided he would like to try his hand at DM for this session the party would locate the body of his character. I, one who always to encourage new players attempt DM, allowed this to happen and I took a back seat as a player. The player unfolded the story before me and I was entranced.

The party arrived to find that necromancers had obtained the body of the vanquished character from the dragon, either through deceit or perhaps a bargain, and were attempting to use the empty husk of a powerful body to bring forth a great evil into the world. In a valiant battle the players charge forth to hinder the ritual, which was slightly successful, yet some portion of the entity was able to infiltrate into the character’s dead body. The undead villain was powerful, our party was strained, and the odds were stacked against us. In the pinnacle of the battle the evil entity made to attack our dwarven fighter, who was in a sense upon a knee and a prayer. As the concept that we were about to lose another player began to cement itself (and by this time I was biting my nails) the evil entity stumbled. The dwarf caught by surprised looked up at the vile creature that had infiltrated his once friend’s body and was humbled. The character had returned wrestling control from the being that possessed him and in a final gesture of kindness, sacrificed him-self destroying his entire being in a fiery explosion…

The session ended. As everyone was preparing themselves the DM, the player whose character died began discussing what new character he should create. I joined in the conversation and we all optimistically looked towards to the future although a lingering feeling remained a feeling that announced that we would not easily forget the fallen hero.

A death is not necessarily the end. In fact in fantasy adventures there are always some ways, some means to bring forth the fallen from their tragic ends. Yet, when an end has finally been reached by either the DM or by the player (which far more the authoritative power in regards to characters), it just saddens the heart and soul as one of the character-element that made the party unique and exciting is extinguished.A character that inspired others to think out of the box and view their specific role in the world in an ultimately different manner... even though at times he seemed despotic.

On a bitter Thursday, in the lumbering month of October, a wizard died. A eulogy won’t be written in honor of him and only those who truly know him will even know that he is missing, yet in the annals of memories he shall never be forgotten.


.~R.I.P.~.~"Ruben~.It's my god complex."~.
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