The Journal of Mallorie


Nerd fail. part two
So this place is a real cultural shithole. The local populace are fracking terrified of PSI fruitloops. There's an active campaign to rat out any fruitloops you encounter. As such, our fruitloops are hiding inside the can "meditating" during our stay.


I'm accompanying our merry band from the Shalimar, selling the goods, securing our cut and maybe buying an easy to flick cargo for our next destination (don't ask me where it is, I worked it out with Alec and Jayne after we "liberated" the Shalimar from the evil capitalist who "inherited" the tin can after our employers death and there's been a lot of bits through that pipe).
All the nerds and Jayne are readying the can for dust off, we're not keen on a long visit. I left Gunter in charge of ship sec. I don't think there will be any problems (fingers crossed, Gunter has been talking to himself again).

The "guest" has sold his cargo (you know, I never did find out what his name was) and I'm making my way back to the boat to check up on progress. I'm admiring the local talent across the street when I get a call from Mira "Mal, there's a problem with our, ahem, bank account"
Instantly, I'm paying attention and patch through the convo to the ship. Sheika answers straight away in his nerdy whine "Well there was a problem with the database when I was trying to insert the exploit into the search request... The field wouldn't innitially accept the length of my query so..."
I'm getting annoyed now "I don't want to hear your nerd excuses Sheika, talk standard and get a solution, Mira sitrep, now"
"We're at the bank and they're about to query the database with a more defined search, I'm stalling"
Jayne pipes in "Sheika has started another database penetration, hang tight Mira"
Just what we needed, a snafu when we're close to leaving this shithole "Uh, I'm having problems with the databases' sec protocols. They appear to have gotten a lot tougher. Perhaps the failed account query has created flags on the account. I'm trying another script"
There's a pause "It didn't work, the system is lighting up with ICE"
A commotion can be heard over the speaker and I hear Jayne "Disconnect Sheika, we don't need them tracing your exploit back to the ship. Mal, I'm heading out to a landline terminal to fix this"
I love it when a lady knows how to take charge. Reminds me of Rosey. I double time it back to the boat "Mira keep stalling, I'm heading back to the boat"
"Sacha, don't let anybody capture you lot"
"Sheika... Get the boat ready for immediate dust off"
"Gunter free up power for weapons and, well don't kill anything until I'm back"

When I get back to the Shalimar, it looks like everything is in hand and we're awaiting Mira and her team before we GTFO. Jayne really pulled through, unlike the nerds. What was Alec doing?

Lets hope nothing else can go wrong.
Viewable by: Public
Tags: Bank , Jayne , Mira , nerd
Nerd fail. part one
So we arrived at the Maccus System and are aimed at Lankarin. We lifted a cargo with a passenger off a forgettable moon and jetted out all quiet like so as to not raise a ruckus. Staying below the notice of the authorities is the theme for the future. The cargo is secure and we've just got to get in, drop off, get paid, get refueled and get the drok outta there.

It looks to be a high tech world, I prefer low tech and a superior firepower bargaining position. But, I got an awesome team of desperados with skills, what could possibly go wrong?

So Alec reckons we're being scanned by planetside and it's just routine (well routine after he asked the damned AI). I'll just try to keep my cool and admire Jayne without looking to admire Jayne pushing buttons (she's touchy of late, must be her time of the month). The Sash is in his room polishing his gun. He has an unnatural attachment to that shotgun, he's forever rubbing on it. Our passenger is keeping to himself, good for me. I hate entertaining. Gunter has started muttering to himself of late, I think he's spending too much time alone with the targeting computer. That nerd has issues with 'people'. I wonder if he's a virgin? I just remembered that Sheika is a nerd too (I'd say Alec is too, but I can talk to Alec). You'd expect them all to get along well and play D&D or something... But no. I guess none of them have any dice to play with. Our resident fruitloops have been keeping themselves busy meditating or some shit. While the rest of the crew have kept the interstellar tin can being interstellar.

Lady Mira has been conversing with the 'guest' and they both enter the room "It has been a quiet and pleasant trip so far captain..."
I'm admiring the shortness of Mira's skirt and almost forget he's there "...oh yeah. They're a top crew"

I think she noticed me noticing her legs but is keeping it on the down low. Good for her, that's why she's this tin cans customer liaison. I pretend not to notice her noticing me noticing her legs and move on to deliberately noticing Jayne pushing buttons.

The landing takes place without any incidents, all shiny. We really do have some good pilots, not that I'd admit it. The passenger (you know I don't even know his name) says something to Mira as the can is berthed, about wanting to talk to me. I wonder if our guest wants to renegotiate the deal? We're getting a cut of the sale of cargo as payment for services "Captain, can I speak to you?"
"We're an open book on this boat, if you have something to say regarding passage and freight, you can say it in front of my crew"
"Oh. Well I'd like to arrange passage from here after the transaction is closed"
This is not what I expected, Mira looks to the rest of us "He doesn't want to stay on the planet, in fact he hates Lankarin"
The guest (I really should ask Mira his name) then speaks up "The planet is full of bigots and they don't like outsiders, my stay would be an uncomfortable one"
The guest looks to all of us "I'd like passage to your next destination after I sell the cargo, anywhere else is better than Lankarin"

Well that begs a question. What the drok is up with this planet?

end part one
Viewable by: Public
Tags: Guest , Lankarin , Nerds
Breaking the tension.
So apparantly there was a frigate after us with a kill order. You'd think that the people we took the ship from would be trying to keep the can intact... Oh well. Besides, the Navytards chasing us were inadequate to the task (big surprise). The button pushers got all excited and there was a question raised as to whether to jump or list lazily to the left (Gunter has a warped sense of humour, he probably just wants to shoot something). I think I was going to suggest that we fight when Jayne took the initiative and jumped us.

Now I'm not your progressive metrosexual high fallutin free thinking modern man, but I do admit women have a place in our society. And Jayne showed us right then, that her place is driving the big tin can (which is her role by the way, well at least until some egghead figures out how to get an AI to fly a tin can, I'm looking at you Sheika). So good for her, it's great for her to have something she can tell her kids about when she has some.

Well we made our escape and I decided that the best thing for me to do was to don my EVA suit, just in case. It was then that Alec made some noises to Brother about if there is something broadcasting our position and identity. I decide to keep quiet and spend some time admiring the Lady Mira who I'm sure has been making eyes at me (must have something to do with me and the recent wetwork, that kind of thing gets the ladies going). I don't mind being appreciated but I need to keep my options open so start making eyes at Jayne for a point of difference. I notice the Sash has also gotten into his EVA suit, shows how much he trusts these button pushers.

Lady Mira starts making her way over to me when Alec makes noises about a ship search for a beacon so I suggest that I'll look through Jayne's underwear drawers. The room goes silent and then the Sash suggests he'll look through the Lady Mira's. I start laughing and so does the Sash. It breaks the tension and we all start relaxing and find areas of the can to search for things that make Alec stay awake at night.


We've just jumped into a shithole system with some reasonably profitable mining ventures and are squawking to a moon of the ninth planet looking for cargo and resupply. We get a bunch of requests for docking broadcast back to us and decide to go with the most desperate and least legit. We've actually arrived rather quickly. The button pushers did good.
Viewable by: Public
Fragged day ends up shiny. Well until tomorrow at least.
First I'm out of a job, then I'm given an opportunity to make some dough. What would you choose? Doesn't take a genius to realize that credits talk and bullshit prospects takes the H train to poor town.

So there I was running & gunning down a wage slave merc with a liberated mag pistol and I think to myself... Is this what I wanted to do with my life? Damn stupid time to be considering life choices when you've got to waste some poor underpaid schmuck before he rains the man's muscle on our ass. But I've had more other epiphanies on the fly before. So me and the Sash are shooting this poor fool while our resident fruitloop stops him from escaping by holding down a button, telekinetically (why oh why am I blessed with such useless excuses for humanity as travelling companions).

Anyway it's not long before superior firepower wins out and the wannabe falls to the ground.

Alec and Jayne have been pushing some buttons and now decide that me and the Sash have to go to the hole in the wall and do a physical credit transfer. I like seeing democracy at work, millenniums of progress and we still do things by a vote (frag that). So the Sash relieves the bodies of extra firepower and palms off a gun or two to the fruitloop and we're on our way.

It's a given that the pros will not fail this aspect of the job and apart from the sitter (which me and the Sash expected, doh) everything is shiny. Now a lot of folks would expect that if somebody started shooting at a couple of pros like me and the Sash, that we'd be wanting to return fire. And that's where your wannabe mercs get geeked. We have an objective and we don't lose sight of it. So instead we make haste for the door to the dock. The Sash drops a few rounds into the keypad effectively locking it and we beat the feet to the ships ramp. As we board the ol can of wasted humanity I again think that maybe my life could have been different. I coulda had more, I coulda had Rosey.

The button pushers are pushing more buttons as the Sash lets 'em know that we were successful. It's then that the tin can starts to hum with life. I know that means and I get secure, I've been to the stars before. As I secure the last loop I hear the main guns fire and we're moving.

I'm not concerned now. My part in the act is complete. It's up to the button pushers now. If they frag it up, all I can hope for is a chance to fight my way out of it.

Fragging button pushers.
Session: Game Session 1 - Sunday, Apr 15 2012 from 1:30 AM to 3:30 AM
Viewable by: Public
1 comment